He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
