Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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