The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
