the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
