i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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