I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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