Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize