WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
