This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
