pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
