I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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