After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I see more hoeing in ur future
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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