All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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