At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
