Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
