I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
