hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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