Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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