i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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