if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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