Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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