Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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