just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just found puke in my bra..
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
