nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
