I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
