Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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