all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize