I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
