Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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