He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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