O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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