doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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