No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
