You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
