Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Congratulations! We have a period
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