I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
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