I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
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