im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
