I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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