Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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