just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
