Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
