I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
