I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize