Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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