The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
