Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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