Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
