I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
