I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
