Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Randomize
