so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
