Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
